10 Reasons Why A First Deer Is Better Than A First Kiss

This past weekend sitting in the deer stand I got to thinking about certain things in life.   In our small deer camp we had two hunters bag their very first deer…indeed, excitement was in the air shared by all of us regarding this life-changing event.

Observing their excitement, it made me think back to my very first deer.   Then, I got thinking about other “firsts” in life—like a first car, a first job…heck, I even thought back to my first kiss.


Young Matt takes his very first deer this past Sunday morning. As for his first kiss, no information was currently available at the time of this posting.

Then, several hours of idle time sitting in the deer stand further got my mind to pondering all these important questions in life.   Somehow, I settled on drawing the comparison between a first deer and a first kiss.

I suppose a non-hunter really wouldn’t understand where I’m about to go with this, but then unless you’ve truly experienced the wonders of hunting there tends to be a lot missing from a person’s life, at least in my experience.

So, here’s my take on Why A First Deer Is Better Than A First Kiss:

  1. A first deer NEVER starts boyfriend/girlfriend rumors causing all your friends to tease you.
  2. A person always takes the time to pose for pictures with their first deer…besides, who wants photographic evidence of that first smooch?
  3. A first kiss usually happens quickly and is quite likely disappointing.  A first deer may take years of effort and the sweet reward of success provides lasting satisfaction.
  4. A person can drive around town and show off their first deer.
  5. It’s ALWAYS necessary to clean up after a first deer.  Rarely, if ever, does a first kiss provide that much sloppy fun.
  6. After a first kiss you could develop a reputation as a lousy kisser.  After a first deer nobody will think of you as a lousy hunter.
  7. With a first kiss you might regret later that it ever happened.   With a first deer there are never any lingering feelings of regret.
  8. If you’re lucky with a first kiss you might remember his/her name.   With a first deer, on the other hand, a hunter likely remembers the date, the time of day, weather conditions, the clothes that were worn, the equipment that was used, who was with the hunter, etc. etc.
  9. A first kiss causes some folks to deny it ever happened.   I’ve yet to meet a hunter who denies ever shooting their first deer.
  10. AND FINALLY, a first deer almost always gives you a little tongue action.  A first kiss…ahh…well, not so likely.

©2010 Jim Braaten.  All Rights Reserved.  No Reproduction without Prior Permission.